Smart Toys, huh?


Whoever thought that it was a smart idea to make loud, obnoxious toys for toddlers, never had kids themselves.

Probably the same people who made clothes for kids…

…another topic for another day.

Seriously, though, toddlers can’t speak in full sentences yet, can barely walk, and don’t yet have a full grasp on depth of perception, much less fiction vs. reality, sooooooo…..

YEAH!  Let’s give them a talking doll that laughs, all the while rolling around on the ground like its possessed!

Needless to say, Tickle Me Elmo didn’t tickle Nicholas pink when he was younger.  He basically screamed and threw it on the floor, after which he eyed Corey and me suspiciously like we were Satan’s helpers.

Close.  We’re SANTA’S helpers.

I learned then that I needed to take him with me when we went toy shopping and stealthily sneak it into the cart when he wasn’t looking if the toy passed the Toddler Test- i.e., didn’t make him pee his pants in terror.

Listen,  I’m all for the holly and the jolly.  I love Christmas and all the things Christmas-y.  But can someone tell me why it is that during this most-wonderful-of-seasons, someone didn’t stop to think that MAYBE a toy that jumps, bounces, laughs maniac-ly, and/or chases after you while doing all of the above doesn’t EXACTLY scream Christmas spirit?

And let’s not forget what I’ve mentioned before- when some toys start to run out of batteries, they can sometimes become possessed.  The last thing I want as a parent is to walk into the boys’ bedroom in the middle of the night to check on them and have Elmo standing there, cackling like a mad man.

Just a simple musing from a SortaSuperMom while you’re out Christmas shopping for your little hooligans- or, maybe you’d want to give that instead of coal…?